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MBB So Hearts This

Chi-Town! True Confessions of The Blogrollers’ BlogHer ‘09 or Bust Road Trip

20 Comments 27 July 2009


I’m okay people! I (finally) made it back from my big Blogrollers BlogHer ’09 or Bust road trip to Chicago for BlogHer 2009 with Christie of My Life a Work in Progress, Lorraine of Ask Wifey and Jennifer of The Baby Makin(g) Machine. I met my people. I made new friends. I heard—and made!—some thought-provoking speechifying. Put at least five pounds of delicious Chicago vittles on my hips. And lived to tell about it (even with Chatterbox behind the wheel!). Here’s the re-cap:

Day 1: We rolled into Chicago five hours behind schedule. The Chevy Traverse was downright dreamy—lots of room, smooth ride, satellite radio with a solid hip hop station that played The Chronic, A Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul, and Bizmarkie, and a video player that rocked the second season of The Dave Chappelle Show. What’s not to love? Side-eye at OnStar, though, for getting us all the way to Louisville, KY, only to start giving us blow-by-blow directions—in Spanish. Right. We made it all the way through Indiana and to Michigan the ol’ school way (nods to MapQuest print-outs), only to sit in traffic for three hours wading through barriers set up for President Obama, who was in his hometown the same time as us (I would have stalked, but, you know, you don’t really stalk the president without getting your feelings—and a few other things—hurt). So between the bad directions and the traffic, we missed all the good parties. No biggie, though: We ended up checking out the Chicago sites—the Harbor, the Magnificent Mile, some incredible architecture and street art—and having a kick-booty meal at Bandera, where the steak and the homemade Oreo ice cream dessert made my doggone night. My night, I tell you!

Day 2: I kicked off my conference right, with a stop in on a panel, featuring Cutie Booty Cakes’ Renee Ross (peep those super sexy red shoes she’s sporting!), about how to extend your blogging “tribe.” I appreciated the tips—visit other blogs, connect with people who aren’t like you, get involved in what other bloggers are doing—but I couldn’t help but to feel like there’s STILL a ridiculous amount of divisiveness/segregation in the bloggy world, in which mainstream (re: white-run) blogs that claim to be for all moms speak mostly—if not only—to white moms, and rarely reciprocate visits to/comments on/involvement in blogs run by moms of color who readily and happily support them.

Well, seems I touched a nerve with that one; twitter was abuzz with a few folks suggesting that people are “intimidated” by MyBrownBaby, presumably because the word “brown” is in the title and it features content about moms who are African American. I thought that was an odd little thing to say, particularly since I’ve written quite passionately HERE about how, though MyBrownBaby is written from MY perspective as a black mom, it’s a space that welcomes and encourages the opinions and insight of ALL moms, no matter their color/race/nationality/background/political leanings/big toe size. Needless to say, it got a little hot up in there for a minute, so much so that my girl over at The Prisoner’s Wife, a lovely writer you should get to know, wrote a post about it. Wanna see it? HERE IT GOES.

Anyway, you should know by now that mess like this doesn’t really shake your girl. I went to the Maria Bailey hosted Disney Mom Bloggers Reunion party, where I bonded with the amazing group of women who’ve all enjoyed the mom magic of Disney, and then headed back to my room, put on some lipstick and my six-inch glamazon platform wedges and high-stepped it over to the Nikon party with co-Blogroller guest Jennifer of the BabyMakin(g)Machine, the beautiful and talented Jennae of Green Your Décor, the uber cute and spunky Sheena of MommyDaddyBlog (who just is incapable of taking a bad picture!) and my girl Katja of Skimbaco Lifestyle, whom I absolutely adore. Carson Kressley was in the house, and a small army of masseuses, hair stylists, and make-up artists were there to pretty up the crowd, but the highlight for me, by far, was Nikon’s drool-worthy new camera, the NIKON D-5000 (its video capabilities and swivel viewfinder make it SO sexy), and Kris, a Nikon photographer who showed me how to use my D-50. I swear, Kris changed my life.


[Sheena of MommyDaddyBlog, getting her top model on]


[Me with Jennifer of The Baby Makin(g) Machine, a.k.a. Young 'Un]


[Me and sweetie pie Katja of Skimbaco Lifestyle]


[My D-50 is cute and all, but this? My dream camera!]

Later, we made our way over to the Macy’s Tower for The Lush Experience with my girls from Mama Law, the lovely Justice Fergie, Justice Ny, and Justice Jonesie. The three are behind the upcoming mom bloggers of color conference, Blogalicious (don’t you just LOVE that name?), coming to Atlanta in October. Their party was the place to be; Afrobella, Corynne Corbett of That Black Girl Site and a lot of other fantastic bloggers of color were in the house, and we all got to sample Lush’s handmade, natural products. Of course, I left with more products than any one woman should ever buy in one trip, including this absolutely deliciously citrus Sexy Peel Soap. Later, we had a sleepover, sans the sleep, at the Justice’s suite, where we polished off desserts and wine from their swanky affair, and talked until the wee hours of the morning. I’m absolutely in love with these women; you MUST make a point of visiting them at Mama Law, and supporting Blogalicious, where I and some other fantastic mom bloggers of color will be speaking.

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Day 3
I kicked off my day watching a spirited panel/talk-it-out fest on marketing to multicultural bloggers. A rundown on the conversation in that room is impossible to do here; I’ll keep top eye out for any videos/audio of the exchanges, which were smart, informative, funny, thought-provoking and eye-opening. Bottom line is: Moms of color are blogging, we have influence and it’s downright foolhardy for companies looking to do business with moms to keep ignoring our divine power and Gucci purses. (Shout out to Karen of CHOOKOOLOONKS, who not only has one of the most amazingly beautiful (visually and poetically) blogs I’ve seen, but also holds it down for us on Momversation, one of my latest obsessions.)

Later, I had a chat with the Pepsico-sponsored Blog Talk Radio show with John Havens, who wanted to know all about why I started MyBrownBaby and just what I meant about that divisiveness comment I made in Friday’s panel. Somehow, we also ended up talking about the whole Skip Gates brouhaha, and then later realized that we lived in neighboring towns when my family was based in South Orange, NJ. Shout-out to John—I really enjoyed our talk about race, diversity, and the “N” word, which extended well beyond the taped show. Keep making it do what it do, John!

Later, still, I signed copies of “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man,” in the BlogHer Expo (it’s STILL No.1 on the New York Times Hardcover Advice Bestseller’s List!), and then had a hearty rib, spinach, and chocolate martini dinner at The Webber Grill with my The Blogroller pals Lorraine of Ask Wifey, Christie of A Work In Progress, Jennifer of The BabyMakin(g) Machine, and Justice Fergie and Justice Jonesie of MamaLaw—the perfect ending to a wonderful weekend.

I’d like to thank The BlogRollers for letting me ride shotgun with them to Chicago—we had such sidesplitting, Thelma & Louise-style fun in that Chevy Traverse, my doggone sides STILL hurt (get the blow-by-blow on Twitter HERE), and I’m so glad for the friendship we forged on our journey. The OnStar ultimately got us back to Georgia safe and sound. I’d also like to extend a special thank you to Disney for the scholarship funds that made my trip to BlogHer possible.

Um, what’s this I hear about BlogHer being in my hometown next year? New York City? Aw, now you know it’s gonna go down!

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MBB So Hearts This

Diamond In the Back, Sunroof Top, Diggin’ The Scene…

18 Comments 22 July 2009

Oh yeah, MyBrownBaby rolled out on the world tour—i.e. “The BlogRollers BlogHer or Bust” trip to Chicago—yesterday, and it’s been non-stop fun with The Blogrollers’ Lorraine of Ask Wifey, Christie of A Work In Progress, and their fourth wheel contest winner, Jennifer of The Baby Makin(g) Machine.

When I tell you we had a time? We had a time. We left from Christie’s house in our super sexy Chevy Traverse, which came totally loaded with all kinds of toys, including an OnStar system that connected us with our own personal assistant to guide us up the road, and a satellite radio system that hooked us up with all kinds of great music—from Earth Wind & Fire to Jill Scott. We also had the hook-up on the iPod, with Deejay Christie on the ones and two, spinning Craig Mack and, wait for it… Captain and Tennille.

Of course, Jennifer almost got kicked out of the ride when she revealed she doesn’t like cornbread, collard greens, yams, or Thanksgiving turkey. After lunch at The Cracker Barrel—can I just tell you that being in that place is literally like being a kid in a candy store?!—she talked her way back into the Chevy by proudly professing her love of okra and chitlins.

Of course, Jennifer promptly tried to get us back for clowning her by planting a whoopie cushion in our seats.

Little prankster.

We’re chilling in Louisville, KY, where we’ll be trying out some of the super delicious products from Vintage Body Spa, a line of all-natural, organic facial and body scrubs, masks, and lotions, before we head off for our second leg of our road trip to BlogHer in Chicago.

Want to see what we’re up to in the Chevy today? Follow each of us on Twitter at @mybrownbaby, @theblogrollers, @chatterboxcgc, @askwifey, and @thebabymakinmachin.

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Thought

Road Trippin’ With The Blogrollers: And We’ll Be Rollin’ In the ‘64, With Everybody Singin’…

7 Comments 21 July 2009

Oh yeah—today is the B.I.G. day! MyBrownBaby is climbing in the Chevy and hitching a ride to BlogHer with none other than Lorraine of Ask Wifey and Christie of A Work In Progress, the dynamic duo behind The Blogrollers, along with their fourth wheel contest winner, Jennifer of The Baby Makin(g) Machine.

The four of us met up last night for our “BlogHer or Bust Road Trip Bon Voyage Party” at Blue Moon Pizza in Vinings, where we quickly commenced to gabbing, laughing, imbibing BlogRoller-tinis, plotting and planning how we’ll keep ourselves entertained on our five-day road trip to Chicago, and—oh yeah!—checking out our incredible ride…

Yup, we’ll be rolling in this beautiful Chevy Traverse, courtesy of GM and the BlogHer Carpools. Sexy, ain’t it? It’s a seven-seater with all the bells and whistles—lots of room (we gotta fit all those bags full of cute clothes somewhere), satellite radio (so we can listen to lots of neo-soul, hip hop, old school, and R&B goodies), a GPS system (so that those of us who happen to be, ahem, directionally challenged, can get to where we’re going), and a video player (I’m bringing Love & Basketball, Dave Chappelle’s Season 2, School Daze, The Five Heartbeats, Coming to America, and John Legend: Live in Concert).

Later today, we’re going to stop in Louisville, Kentucky for a spa party and dinner, and after a good night’s rest, we’ll hit the road again on Thursday, headed for The Sheraton in Chicago, site of this year’s BlogHer conference. Our dance cards are full; along with all of the fantastic programming BlogHer has planned, there’ll be some awesome partying going on. If you’re at BlogHer this year, you’ll find MyBrownBaby at the Lush Experience, hosted by the ladies of Blogalicious; the Nikon Night Out at Flatwater; the Disney Mom Bloggers Reunion at the MomSelect Swag Suite; and at the BlogHer book store on Saturday, July 25, signing copies of “Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man,” from 4:15-4:45 pm.

Otherwise, you can find me in the lobby, talking smack, meeting up with my bloggy buddies, and making lots of new friends. I can’t wait to see you there, and to spill all the juicy details about my road trip with The Blogrollers.

It’s. About. To. Go. Down.

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Thought

{MyBrownBaby Redux} There’s No Place Like Home

3 Comments 12 July 2009

Editor’s Note: I wrote this piece while I was away on a solo (and much-needed) getaway, while suffering a severe bout of Extreme Lonelys. Of course, there’s nothing like a pile of laundry, a messy living room, and a sink-full of dishes to cure The Lonelys. Alabama isn’t looking so bad right about now. Maybe if I just click my heels…

By DENENE MILLNER

They come every afternoon with book bags flying and their converse stomping the front lawn and their maniacal little giggles rushing into the still air, oblivious to what has been done while they were gone, and what still is to get done, too. I am usually clutching my “to do” list to my chest, with way too many “to-do’s” still unchecked, a little frantic. It is rush hour at the Chiles household, and my second, third, fourth, and fifth jobs are about to begin—homework tutor, chauffeur, cook, bathtub wrangler, midnight seductress. I want to hide. Or call in reinforcements. Or better, just take the doggone day off.

My husband, God bless him, notices these things, and, on occasion, takes mercy on me. Sometimes, that mercy comes in the form of take-out dinner, or a break from after-dinner kitchen duty, or all-access to the bedroom remote and my trusty pillow. And when he’s feeling especially benevolent, Nick, the editor-in-chief of the travel magazine Odyssey Couleur, tosses a travel junket my way—an all-expenses-paid trip to somewhere where laundry rooms and homework are non-existent, somebody else cooks and drives and cleans, and I can just chill, sans interruption or obligation. In return, I write a story about my trip for his magazine, but this is small payment.

The. Trips. Are. Glorious.

I started writing this MyBrownBaby blog from the shores of the Alabama gulf coast, where Nick has sent me for a four-day respite. I’m posted up in a well-appointed, three-bedroom, two bathroom condo—spotless, with granite countertops in the eat-in kitchen, a grand king-sized bed in a master bedroom with a huge deck overlooking the bay, and a flat-screen TV equipped with CNN, HGTV, and an endless loop of Bravo’s “Project Runway,” and “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.” There is no laundry room (not one that I have to use, anyway). All dirty dishes are being left on the tables at fine restaurants all across town—for someone else to clean. There are no dirty little brown girl booties in my Jacuzzi bathtub. And nobody is smacking me on my shoulder, waking me from a sound slumber to tell me their throat is sore, or they’re so parched that surely they’re going to die of thirst, or the little boy from “Where the Wild Things Are” just might be hiding out in the closet.

There is only peace here.

I’m finding it in the gentle whisper of the wind tickling the ocean just outside my window, a Heavenly early morning alarm, for sure. And on the deck of sail boats, while I teeter dangerously over the edge to feel the water spray against my face and watch the dolphin play tag and beg for the croacker and jewel fish and eel and shrimp the captain’s caught and tossed their way. There is peace, too, in the wildlife refuge I hiked this morning, where Hurricane Ivan had his way, but somehow, the beauty of this land and all its inhabitants remained steady, stunning, and sure. And I found plenty of satisfaction at the bottom of the gigantic bowl of bread pudding and homemade whipped cream I just demolished, without worry or apology.

I wore red shoes and red lipstick, and sexy dresses and curls in my hair—and drank mojitoes and slurped down raw oysters with plenty of horseradish and hot sauce, and flitted about without a care in the world. And then I came back to this big ol’ condo, and turned on the TV, and lay across the bed and, well… did the mom punk out. I’m longing for my family—wishing that Mari and Lila could have held the slimy fish in their hands and giggled when the dolphin dipped in and out of the water, and that Mazi could have walked along the beach and tasted the plethora of shrimp prepared in more ways than even Forrest Gump and his friend Bubba ever could have imagined. And I am longing to fall asleep in Nick’s arms—to lay my head on his chest and let the thump of his heartbeat soothe me like no ocean waves ever can.

I’m longing, simply, for life—my simple family life.

All of a sudden, this three-bedroom condo seems cavernous—too dark and a little scary. As I sit here with every light in this place blazing, CNN blaring the same Obama/McCain/America-As-We-Know-It-Is-Coming-To-An-End stories it’s had on repeat for the past three weeks, I’m reminded of a passage in bell hook’s picture book, “Homemade Love,” a bedtime favorite in our house, about a little “girl pie” whose parents love her hard and strong. At night, they tuck their little “honey bun chocolate dew drop” in, and she snuggles under her covers—in her bed, in her house, safe, satisfied, and surrounded by unconditional love. And when she falls asleep, this is on her mind:

Memories of arms that hold me
Hold me tight
No need to fear the dark place
‘Cause everywhere is home

Really, there’s no place like home, is there? I mean, I’m so very grateful for this “me time”—every last one of us hardworking moms craves it—deserves it. I also know that so many of us aren’t blessed to have these kinds of “get away” opportunities come their way—that work gets in the way and family gets in the way and busy gets in the way and, yes, we get in our own way.

But the peace and solitude I found here in Alabama can’t compare to the peace and solitude I find in my chaotic, messy, love-filled home. There, with arms that hold me tight, I have no need to fear the dark place.

Because at my house, everywhere is home.

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